In Search of new Heights

I Grew up with fear of heights. For me ,it was also more related to the fear of unknown. As a result, I was risk averse. I had a childhood until middle school where I spent most of my time indoors and retreated to activities that I was comfortable with.

It all changed with a trip to the gorge 2 hrs. north of my home town , with friends, the summer before high school. The Park itself was wonderful and was very scenic.

Little did I know that I would end up climbing rocks like spiderman towards the last part of the hike. It was not for the faint hearted. It was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life. This experience gave me a reason to try my best.

¾ of the trail was moderately difficult. Then came the last part where I had to climb the boulders. If I had known this, I would have avoided this trip. Despair weighed me down when I looked at the distance I needed to climb. I sank to my knees. Nature was daunting to me for the first time. The 45 degrees inclines looked steeper and steeper. 

Doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering what if I am not going to complete this. The other members of my team, attempted to comfort me, but whatever they said, just went over my head.

There was one place where I was holding to a tree branch to climb the rock. The branch was weak and it snapped. I slipped and bumped my knee.  That was a minor injury but it destroyed all the confidence that I had in me. Sometimes all it takes is just one failure to shut someone’s resiliency and that is what happened to me at that moment. Fear started to taking over my abilities. I was kind of stuck wondering  if I would ever be able to make it to the end.

While I was struggling,  I saw a kid much younger than me navigating this terrain with his dad. They were climbing the mountains like seasoned mountain goats.  The fact that the young kid was able to progress gave me the first hope. I realized that the challenge was not external but internal to me.

I told myself the best way up is to make incremental progress and stay focused. I set small goals along the way. This was a big life lesson to me. I was beginning to get some clarity and not allow my mind to wander about unknowns. Sometimes, you have to bide more time, work at you pace and keep things simple to make progress. I realized ; it does not have to be hurried. All that was needed as a focus with a clear mind while climbing the boulders.

This hike taught me there are different ways to solve  the problem. I learned the value of choosing the best option and taking calculated risks. It is more than your physical skills. Good judgement and decision making is essential for success. 

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While I was exhausted physically, I was fulfilled mentally. It made me more confident and gave me a new perspective to address problems.

When I face challenges , I close my eyes and remember the past. I set small goals and stay focused on them to achieve my larger goal. My feat was no Mount Everest but I found ways to face and manage my fears.